Sunday, September 26, 2010

Learning to trust

On the night of the 25th, I rode into El Dorado, KS, after a long day of riding. One of the most stunning experiences: riding through the countryside, coming to the top of a crest, the setting sun ahead of you, and you are riding along a front of thunderclouds. A light breeze, a little rain, and the earth just open around you. All the while battling to make headway. That moment is implanted in my brain.

So, I pulled into town, after dark, again, feeling very cold, and in a lot of ways alone, really hoping to find some kind of companionship. I asked around for places to camp, prayed to run into someone who might let me camp in their yard, but I was just directed to a local park. Kinda depressing, especially on a cold, windy night. But, at the same time, looking back, I think it was  test of dependency. Do I really trust that the Lord will provide? Do I really trust that He'll give me what I need, He'll protect me, He'll provide? To I let His love, His grace, His approval be enough for me? Or do I still yearn to find fulfillment in other things, such as the acceptance of others?

The next day, I attended First Presbyterian of El Dorado, and God took care of me, in extravagent ways, even though I still struggle to trust Him. I met Mal and Janice Shaffer, and they were the biggest blessing to me. They took me to lunch with their friends, let me stay in their house, and bought groceries for me. It was amazing to be so warmly welcomed by people who I have never met before, and me, one who doesn't deserve that kind of grace. Again, God provides, even when I have so little faith.

5 comments:

  1. I guess God knows what's best better than we do. But I'm still glad those people took care of you on Sunday.

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  2. Helmer, thanks for the reminder that God is faithful to provide. May our faith and trust in Him increase! Praying for you and your travels, friend!

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  3. "And I am liking hills, because they're not too windy, and you get the best views from them." doesnt always seem that way when you're climbing them though does it...isnt God AWESOME! and ALWAYS faithful.

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  4. Dude, I've loved reading these updates. It's neat to hear how God's growing you through these times, and how you're learning how to trust and love well. Keep it up man, and make to the big CO! haha

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  5. Ryan,

    I think this whole trip is an awesome idea. I've had dreams about hiking across Canada or driving Canada's HWY #1. You have way more motivation & passion about the idea than I do though, I think. In any case, your epiphanies are great reminders to keep looking to God in difficult circumstances. Further up and further in!

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